Nathan

Personal

And yet again, it’s been another long time since I last wrote my thoughts. It is now already one year since I decided to go this path, thinking that I’ll still be keeping my options open. Now, looking at it, this one year has both been a blessing and despair for various reasons. But despite that, I am still thankful for this opportunity, because if I was already working elsewhere, I would not had the time to enjoy going to different places, and explore my other options for the future. This experience had led me to finally understand the path I am going to take soon, the type of work I am going to do, etc.

Enjoying work has been something difficult to do in this context. Almost all if not all of us were disappointed with the way things were happening, especially with the change in management. There were lots of missed opportunities and broken promises that should have been provided to us, but we all came to finish what we started until the last few months of this year. Despite that, we still moved forward, somehow fulfilling our interests as we went along. But we are still thankful that the core promises were kept up until this point.

Now, it should be the last term for finishing my masters degree as I have targeted before. But it’s now impossible to finish this term. I resigned to enrolling for residency instead of thesis writing, because it is really impossible to finish this term. I am doing a thesis that is related with other people, and somehow, the problematic algorithm was assigned to me. The original algorithm ran for 10 hours using a cluster of 1000 Pentium 3 computers. My task is to benchmark the algorithm and to include a module for shortening the time it takes for the algorithm to run. The module is assigned to another person. I cannot move on until this problem and other inherent problems (which I will not elaborate on anymore) are resolved.

Actually, thinking about it, there should be no problem if I do not finish the thesis at once, since most people are not able to achieve that – finishing the thesis in two terms. And, I can always continue doing it even when I am already working elsewhere. So now, as December draws near, I am beginning to feel pressure once again, as I will be once again put to a decision about my life. Right now, I am simply focusing on enjoying the last months of the year, and I am happy I am making progress with the current project our team was assigned, and another project for a competition I had entered, together with two of my friends/colleagues. At least there are still consolations and other things that keep us alive despite everything.

I will look forward. I will be there where I need to be. Zettai!

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